Eight year old boys

November 15, 2010

There is a boy in Izzy's class, let's call him Billy, who makes me laugh a lot.

A few months ago the school was consulting parents about sex education and Billy's mother was telling me that she hoped they postponed it until the following year so that Billy would be a bit more mature.

When I asked why, she said that Billy had recently learned the word "vagina" and liked to mention it loudly and frequently. So for example, in town he would hold up a skirt and say, "Mum, you could wear this over your VAGINA" or greet her as she came out of the bathroom with the words, "Here comes Mum and her great big VAGINA!" The worst part was his four-year-old sister had cottoned on and started joining in too.

I must admit, dear reader, that I laughed. A lot. It's easy to see the funny side when it's not your little darling humiliating you :)

This weekend was Isabel's birthday party and Billy was one of the invitees.

The first time Billy came to my attention was when he won a slinky in the pass-the-parcel. He got it out of the box, held it to his groin and allowed it to bounce up and down, grinning from ear to ear. I giggled.

Later, we're about to play Wink Assassin . I come into the room to find Billy teaching the others to say "ASS-assin". I laugh. Billy shouts, "ASS!" at the top of his voice. I give him a look and he whispers "...assin".

Another game played at the party was "make the longest chain of paperclips you can in one minute". Billy insists on carrying his chain around with him, waving it from his groin and shouting, "Look at my dangly bits!"

I thought it was bloody hilarious. Mattgreen, not so much.

Oh dear, he sounds like a mini Jay from the 'Inbetweeners'! He will be that annoying man in a nightclub who repeats the same deperate sleazy lines until some unsuspecting/naive/near comatose woman succumbs. Eww.
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