What's in a name?

June 17, 2009

So... Spankcracker. It has a certain ring to it, don't you think?

It all started with the Monty Python string sketch, in which the advertising company's name is Mousebat, Follicle, Goosecreature, Ampersand, Spong, Wapcaplet, Looseliver,
Vendetta and Prang*.

Mattgreen and I used to work for a company which had quite a lot of contact with architects, who were and indeed still are a source of never-ending derision from Mattgreen. He created a spoof architectural practice called 'Spankcracker and Flange' and used to have shouty pretend mobile phone conversations to impress upon others his view that architects are quite dim.

"Hello, Nicholas Spankcracker here, Spankcracker and Flange, Architects. I've got a jolly nice cardigan on and I wouldn't want to soil it by doing any real work, so if you could just shin up that 16 foot wet ladder and make your way through 10 years of pidgeon poo, I'll be right over here drinking a cappuchino in my Mercedes. Tally ho!"

Later on, Spankcracker made its way into our general vocabulary as a faux swear word. As any parent will tell you, there comes a point in your child's development where you have to stop swearing because if you don't, your child will immediately start copying the filthiest thing you've ever said. And then they will go and say it to Grandma.

Spankcracker is generally used as a noun, to replace other less savory options like 'twat' or 'bastard'. I hope that clears things up!

* Incidentally, the Contractual Obligation Album is completely, hilariously brilliant, and if you have never heard it then you really should.

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