It is Saturday afternoon, and I am sitting in a park at a little music festival with Lee-Anne getting slowly drunk on pints of weak lager in the sunshine. I notice a man nearby has a large tattoo on his leg. It is written in curly script and is difficult to read, but I eventually work out it says 'Danielle'. I point it out to Lee-Anne.

Me: Look at that bloke's tattoo! It took me ages to even read what it said.
L-A: It's probably his daughter, or his girlfriend's name.
Me: (peering at his girlfriend) I'd hate it if someone had my name tattooed on their body.
L-A: What if Mattgreen had "Alicey" tattooed across his chest?
Me: I'd laugh ... then I'd be horrified ... then I'd refuse to have sex with him ever again!

Seriously though - why do people have other people's names tattooed on themselves? Surely even if it's your child, or your mum, or your beloved pet: you wouldn't want to look at their name every single day? And what about when it goes wrong, Katie Price?

I'm quite keen on tattoos - I like Lily Allen's shh! and Angelina Jolie's co-ordinates, and I even think the girl with the 56 stars looks kind of cool - but I just can't get my head around names. I don't think I'd even like my name written on someone else in marker pen... it would just be too weird.