End of course assessment

April 20, 2006

Mattgreen is reading my end of course assessment for my nutrition course.

Mattgreen: This question about chick peas...
Alice: Yes?
Mattgreen: Chick peas also contain cellulose.
Alice: Oh, not cellulose, non-starch polysaccharides.
Mattgreen: They must contain cellulose. All plants contain cellulose.
Alicey: (Questioningly) Oh, are chick peas a ...
(I pause, realising I'm about to say something idiotic)
Mattgreen: (realising what I was about to say) No! They're an animal! In fact they're a predator, little hordes of marching chick peas savaging spiders and caterpillars...
(I am curled up in a ball, pissing myself)
Mattgreen: Before intensive battery farming, they used to be rounded up by little herders, called pea bodies!
(Tears are rolling down my cheeks)
Mattgreen: Honestly, you make it too easy for me.

So if chick peas are in fact animals as mattgreen proposes, does that mean they have a 'pulse'?
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