The night before Isabel's birthday, I was preparing food for her party in the kitchen. I'd bought some cocktail sausages from Waitrose because I feel bad about buying testicle-and-eyelid pre-cooked ones prepackaged in Asda. I was cooking them when Mattgreen appeared, sniffing the air optimistically.

Mattgreen: What are you making? Mmmm, I want one, what are they?
Alicey: Those ones are pork, apricot and lovage. You're not allowed them, they're for the children.
Mattgreen: I want some lovage. I never get any lovage! Where is the lovage?
Alicey: You wouldn't know what lovage was if it bit you on the ass.
Mattgreen: (sings) I wanna know what lovage is!

Even now, over a month later, this conversation cracks me up.