phil and i have gone to a cafe for breakfast (i think it was called the adventure cafe). we ordered a coffee, a tea, a bacon sandwich and a bagel then sat down.

phil: this place is famous in bath for employing really attractive waitresses, but they are useless so the service is always really bad.
alicey: (laughing) oh right.
(literally 30 seconds later)
waitress: (comes up to table) you ordered a tea yeah, and uh...?
phil: a coffee.
waitress: oh yeah, right. (skips off)
alicey: (laughing)
(ten minutes later)
waitress: (puts down plate in front of phil) there you are! errr... did you want something else as well?
phil: yes, we ordered a bagel.
waitress: oh yeah. okay, that'll be along in a minute!
phil: (peers at plate) that's quite a bacon sandwich. (plate has a ciabatta on it, halved and covered in melted cheese with meat and vegetables underneath it)
alicey: (peering at plate) i can't even see the bacon! looks nice though.
(five minutes later. phil hasn't started because he's politely waiting for mine to arrive)
waitress: uhhh, excuse me, did you order a bacon sandwich?
phil: yes.
waitress: oh, sorry, that isn't yours. (whips plate away) er, yours will be here in a minute. (skips off)
(alicey watches her carry the plate over to another table, apologise, then present this person with their sandwich. niiiice)

eventually our food did come, and it was nice, but christ! i don't think i've ever been to a restaurant where the staff were more inept. have to admit though, the waitress was quite a fox. rrrrrr!